Still Praying For Mumbai

The unrelenting horror in Mumbai continues to the second day. From here, we see and read many stories. Stories of terror, violence, barbarism and cold-bloodedness. Also stories of bravery, heroism, sacrifice and endurance. We can only continue to watch on in mixed shock, horror, despair and hope as events unfold in Mumbai and pray for a quick end to the carnage with no more bloodshed.

From Jaskon and friends at Pitch and Pay, our hearts go out to all those directly involved in and affected by this tragedy. Godspeed and much respect to the cops, military, firemen, medical workers and journalists who have been at the scene for over 36 hours now.

A Prayer For Mumbai

Its hard to believe that such an attack as what is going on in Mumbai right now could ever take place. But if it had to happen, I suppose India was a prime target all along. From the initial reports of gunfire, to what we now know to be a large scale terrorist attack, we’ve been going back to the news every few minutes today not so much anymore to get a idea of the situation as in the fervent hope that its all over.

Thankfully, neither I nor any friends or family have ever been affected directly by such random, senseless acts of terrorism, but I share the same sinking, desperate feeling every Indian feels at such a moment. I too ask myself ‘why?’ and realise that that question has no easy answer. I also ask myself ‘when will all of this end?’ and realise that its not going to go away anytime soon. Any notions we may have of safety and security (physical or economic) have been changed forever, if not destroyed altogether. Our world is changing.

Mumbai has been through so much in recent years, but I believe that this attack has been worse than those that happened before. Not just for the magnitude, but for the sustained intensity of the developments that have beseiged the city for almost an entire day now. The entire city is on tenterhooks and no one feels safe anywhere. The emergency services have done an outstanding job of rising to the occasion and doing their best to eliminate the threat. Many have already paid with their lives. Many continue to put their life on the line to ensure that order is restored.

I spoke to Nix, who has family in Mumbai, and he was unaware of the full situation. He was quite optimistic, though, that everything would return to normal soon. I do not know for sure. Being as far away as we are from what is happening in Mumbai, all my roommates and I feel is the quiet helplessness of being unable to make sense of what is happening. Jambu has been monitoring the news nonstop and giving us regular updates. The rest of us have been discussing the occurences and possible motives; trying in vain to rationalise what is happening.

It is quite depressing to continue watching or reading the news, so I have stopped. All I can do is send up a silent prayer for the victims, their families, the emergency services and the people of Mumbai as a whole. Our world is changing. Lets hope its ultimately to the benefit of us all.

Stuff About Stuff

This blog is now as many posts old as I am years old. While the intended update rate is higher than the turning of my years, the last three weeks have not given that impression. To atone for that then, here’s a mini-post about my experience so far.

I started eight or nine months ago with no idea what to write or how to start, and a few apprehensive (and promptly deleted) posts later, that’s the way it stayed until July of this year, when I remembered this space I had registered and how it was going to waste, mostly because I really liked the name Pitch and Pay (well, it makes sense to me). So I figured I’d give it a shot again. And so I did.

It helped that this happened in July-August as it gave me something immediate and intimate to write about without going overboard (okay, just a little bit). Then I started watching Akkarakazhchakal, and I decided to write about my like of it. Somehow, that post still gets around ten hits a week, round about the time a new episode is supposed to come out. I still pity the people who google for new episodes and find me.

The turning point for me, however, was when I could finally reveal to friends that I had been writing, with this charming little story of assumptions gone wrong. Since then I have been able to count on at least so many readers for a post, and feedback has been positive so far. I am thankful to my friends (especially those who remain friends after having to suffer my writing) and to the occasional visitors who read and comment. I don’t do it for the fame and all (wink, wink), but a pat on the back is appreciated.

I often find it very hard to express how I feel about things. Usually I don’t think all that much about stuff either. So I find it hard but, at the same time, interesting to force myself to think and put word after word in order to make myself sound coherent to others. So, overall, yeah, its been fun.

But I really must start posting more often.

PS: I’ve been sitting on this post for a while now. Just pushed it out now to make way for the next one.

Detective Jambu Investigates

Based (very loosely) on a true story.

It was a dark and slightly rainy evening and Shake was cooking dinner. BC and Golu were helping, when Golu decided it would be a great idea to make papads. Not regular papads or pappadams or appalams or whatever. The kind that looks and tastes like a giant circular frym. Yeah, those. So, Golu got straight down to it. Got out the kadhai, cooking oil, and the aforementioned papads. Before long, there were somewhere between ten and fifteen lip-smackingly appealing papads on the dinner table. This is when strange things started happening.

BC and Shake were busy with the dal-chawal, and Golu had returned to his supine position on the bed with his stomach-top (well, his laptop, but its never on his lap). Shake, according to the story he would later tell Jambu, suddenly notices something awry: the papad count seems a bit less than it was before. Shrugging it off as possibly a counting mistake, but making a mental note of the number of papads remaining, Shake goes back to his valiant and thankless job of feeding the hungry hordes.

A few moments later, Shake goes to place dinner on the table and ring the dinner bell to trigger the Pavlovian responses that bring the rest of us to the table. It was then that he notices that this time, the number of papads on the plate had definitely dropped. He was right! Thievery! Skullduggery! Right under his nose. Seeing no evidence as to who might have perpetrated this offense, Shake decides that its time to call in a prefessional.

Jambu was sitting motionless with his laptop (placed where it was supposed to be placed), in his usual meditative pose, eyes transfixed on the screen, doing what only great men know and can explain. Shake hesitantly made a small noise to attract the master’s attention. Jambu turned his head ever so slightly to acknowledge him. Shake told him of his predicament. Jambu gave a small, almost imperceptible nod, to dismiss Shake and let him know that he was on the case.

Jambu cracked his knuckles, set aside the laptop, did a quick recon of the surroundings and set Shake and BC on a perimeter watch before taking up a camouflage position on the sofa with his laptop. Then the waiting started.

The minutes seemed to pass like hours. The strain was showing on Shake and BC, who were desperate to get it over with. Jambu alone maintained his composure, but he made a note of the body language of Shake and BC. Could it be that they knew more than they were letting show? Shake started to get nervous under Jambu’s steely gaze. BC started sweating. Was it just the waiting getting to them? Or was one of them the real criminal? Putting his best Poirot-esque deductive skills to work, Jambu ran through the scenarios in his mind. Shake could easily have slipped out of the kitchen and nicked the papads when no one was looking. BC also was unwatched the whole time. It would have been easy to escape attention and take a few unseen bites. Jambu had his suspects, and they knew he was watching them. It was just a matter of which one would crack first.

In between the unbearable suspense, something happens which takes everyone off-guard. Golu, who was assumed to immobile till further notice on his bed, appears in the dining area and, oblivious to the inquisition that Jambu was planning on Shake and BC, took a papad and almost instantaneously, it disappears down his mouth. Shake and BC are relieved to be let off Jambu’s suspect list and Jambu is flummoxed that he missed this most usual of suspects. When questioned, Golu confesses matter-of-factly to have consumed the rest of the papads. The remaining three curse him and warn him with dire consequences if he touches another papad. I think he managed to sneak another one while having dinner, though.

PS: Apparently, this really took place a day or two ago, while I was at college (no, not studying). Given earlier experiences, I am glad I wasn’t there. Masala has been added in many places to make it suitable for public consumption. Oh, I have so many more Golu stories, and only one lifetime to write them down. The Jambu stories, of course, will take many many lifetimes, so I shall only attempt to touch on the highlights in any more stories you might see here.

Have a great weekend everyone. Here’s some Kaki King for your listening pleasure. And because I love you all so much, here’s some more.

Its Over. Finally.

We here at Pitch and Pay world headquarters apologize for the long delay in between posts. We realize that there are people who have come to depend upon us for their regular dose of inanity. But we have not been slacking off. Our misguided and misanthropic founder, Jaskon, has spent the better part of the last three weeks neglecting his studies and following the developments in the political arena (he was searching for a downloadable link for Nailin’ Paylin). He has, in the end, decided to call it off and offer a guest column to our old friend, Bull O’Really of WOLFNews. Bull has graciously consented to put his dyspeptic grumblings to email and send us his view of the recently concluded 2008 US election (Hint: Obama won). So, straight from the horse’s mouth, here’s some more Bull:

Hello fellow Americans and foreign pinheads. This election is finally over, after what seemed like an endless campaigning cycle. The liberal loonies get their way this time, and Barack Obama has proved that he had the better PR machine. A great day for the Internets, who have been the real victors by managing to both hold both candidates accountable through the reportage of facts on blogs and youtube and simultaneously being the great obfuscators, a role.that we in the traditional media, and especially us at WOLFNews, have specialized in in the past.

So, Obama wins. A big day for America, having voted in the first African American president in the world. Obama supporters all over the country are in the streets celebrating and partying the night away. I just hope no one decides to take a baseball bat to my car. I knew I should have removed the ‘Palin/McCain’ sticker and the ‘Obama wants to nuke unborn babies’ sticker before polling started. And I’m no bigot or anything, but those are gangsters, gay people and liberal tin-foil hat wearers out there celebrating. Who else would vote for Obama? Anyway, I just hope that the few thousands of people who actually profited from the Bush regime will find a way to cope with the presidency of this socialist who wants to raise their (and especially my) taxes a mammoth 3% while the rest of the country gets richer. That’s less fuel for my seventh limo, people. Throw a guy a bone, will you? Those poor cretins are supposed to stay poor. Who will take care of me?

Having said all that, I hope Obama’s presidency will not be as disastrous as George W Bush’s was successful. I hope the democrats understand that in the end, they have to work for us average Americans (wink, wink) and fill our corporate coffers with money. And still, Biden who?

And lets hear it for John McCain. While not the star of his own campaign, he played his part and set a great example for an honest, transparent campaign and we hope that that’s the last we hear of him. Sarah Palin, though. What a lady. She really put the ‘fun’ back in ‘fundamentalist nutjob’. Just the kind of person that an average Joe (Sixpack or Plumber, take your choice. Still no Bidens, though) trusts to lead America. Shoot first, suppress any questions later. I tell you, if W was a president you wanted to have a beer with, Sarah Palin could have been a president you could go hunting with and not get shot in the face, as long as you agree with whatever she says, which is perfectly sensible.

Trust me Americans, this is not the end of the Barracuda. For while the liberal media and the ghetto crowd are going on about Obama, he’s already old news. Campaigning for the 2012 election starts next week. Only 1460 more shopping days till the next election. She’s gunning for the big one this time. No, not moose. The presidency. Who said that the $150,000 in clothes was a waste? If Obama plans to end the war in Iraq, Americans will be in need of some way to lose their hard earned money. After all, we haven’t given nearly enough for the Wall Street bailout. It is not yet certain who her running mate will be: the sixpack guy or the plumber. Other conservative experts say that any fifth grader will also make for a good running mate, as the kid will help make up for any supposed deficiencies in areas other than foreign policy. Don’t sell that house in Alaska, Sarah. You don’t want to lose the edge in foreign relations.

It is also heartening to see that we will be seeing the return of some sensible faces in the Democratic crowd as well, such as this fine gentleman. Good to see some good, hard working, average Americans out there.

All in all, while we at WOLFNews channel and our ilk retreat to lick our wounds and begin the next four years of catty swipes on the president who we will hold responsible for the mess the country is in, there’s still hope for America in ‘12. Lets just hope that before that, Sarah Palin can get an endorsement from Jesus.

Now, let me go see if my car is still parked in the lot. I just got a new radio installed.

We thank Bull for his ponderous prophecies. As we wish that he finds new wind for his bag under the new government, we would like to sign off saying two things: ‘Stay classy San Diego, and stay classy America’ and ‘We should hire Bull to write for us full-time. Lets see if he accepts payment in Cheetos packets’.

PS: What a relief. Lets hope Obama lives up to the highest and noblest of his intentions and promises and shows the rest of the world that the ideal that is America might still be alive. And lets really hope we’ve seen the last of Sarah Palin.

PPS: Someone please give these guys a TV show. They’re the real, real deal.